Kindness Instead of Quarrels
By · CommentsA couple of weeks ago, Michelle was asking me when I’d weigh in about the pastor who wanted to burn Qurans. Although we’re not talking about the pastor in particular anymore, I’ve found a place where I think the Bible weighs in on the controversy – and as always, right down to our hearts, too.
I am reading my way through 2 Timothy, a book I’d have to say I don’t know too much about other than the “famous” verses that pop out. It surprised me to find some thoughts about kindness and gentleness that sound all too a propos for these days.
I have a fondness for those fruits of the Spirit that seem to get lumped together and not discussed – goodness, kindness, gentleness. This started years ago when I was asked to speak on all three for 10 minutes in a presentation on the fruits. Someone put them all together, thinking they were basically the same thing. They are not! I tried to show that in my allotted ten minutes. Then it started me on the lookout to find these qualities in the Bible for the last 25 years.
These are instructions for anyone who wants to be “the Lord’s servant.”
And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will. – 2 Timothy 2:23-26
There are two ways to get into a quarrel: you are drawn into one when another person becomes combative, or you pick a quarrel, saying inflammatory things that you know will lead to quarreling. If we’re told to be careful not to get pulled in to a quarrel, we certainly shouldn’t be starting one.
Now, putting “Quran Burning” in huge letters outside a church is an extreme example. (An aside: many bemoaned the attention the media gave the story. I don’t know exactly how they found the pastor, but think about it: he wanted to be found. He was picking this quarrel and hoping to amplify it.) But at home, on the smaller scale, how many times have you heard someone say the “clever” snide remark that is going to humiliate and raise ire? The one that comes to my mind is the “joke” about Adam and Steve, by which some people feel they’ve handily put down their opposition. But then there are the people who say, “Those people who believe in eternal security, they….” or, “those people who speak in tongues, they….” I’ve worshiped with both of “them” over the years. It’s a disgrace to talk about other believers like that. Because
Instead, {the Lord’s servant} must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. – 2 Timothy 2:24b
To be kind to another, we have to be respectful of him as a human being, even if we cannot respect his viewpoint. To be able to teach, we have to know Scripture, not hearsay or smart remarks. To not resent the other person’s religion and what hurtful things that religion may have done, we have to put away our pride. We are not better than the other person or his ideas. We have found Someone better than both of us. Someone who ended quarrels. Someone who was not only kind, but even gentle and humble of heart (Matthew 11:29). Someone whose very name is above any other name – most certainly our names (Philippians 2:9). The very thought of my name compared to His makes me wither. We are supposed to introduce others to that Someone – Jesus – holy and true, not someone combative and prejudiced.
Those who oppose him he must gently instruct – 2 Timothy 2:25a
If you confront a person on any subject, you need to know what your objective is. Are you bringing up your points to bring harmony, or a greater understanding? If your objective is to show the other person “what’s what”, or to make sure they know you are right and they are wrong, then pride is leading the way, not reconciliation.
Here, the gentle instruction is going to lead to evangelism, the opportunity to share who Jesus really is with the person. Posturing and put downs are never going to do it. I doubt that anyone has ever said, “Now that you’ve shredded all my beliefs and made me look like a fool, I want to accept your Jesus.” You realize that’s ridiculous once I’ve said it; do we always realize it when we’re talking to someone?
That they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will. – 2 Timothy 2:26
Paul says the unbeliever is trapped. They have been taken captive, and often have been taught to take more people captive into the same false religion or cult. There’s been an outcry about human trafficking in part because we can see, and hopefully stop, the horrible kidnappers and abusers. Even when people are being belligerent about an ungodly viewpoint, Paul is saying that beneath it all, they are trapped by the real enemy that we do not see. If we could see their captivity, would we argue with them? Wouldn’t we rather work with them gently and try to get them out of there?
Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. – Philippians 4:5
Lord, it’s a human failing to want to fight and put down others. Please help us all to be kinder and gentler the next time there is a conflict of opinion and remember it’s an opportunity to show Jesus’ kindness, gentleness and love. Amen.
Patience for his Perfect Work
By · CommentsAugust 12, 2010
The night my son was born was one of the greatest moments of my life. When he was put in my arms I could immediately sense that somehow this child was special. I know every parent thinks that, but there was just something about him. He was the first boy to be born in my family in 41 years; that boy, my brother, had died in 1965, so now there was only my 81 year old father and this new little life. My father had had strokes and couldn’t speak well, but there was no disguising how pleased he was. My son showed so much promise, especially in art, where he actually started out as a prodigy. I tried to give him extra exposure to art, and opportunities to explore music and sports as well. We saw a bright future ahead.
This morning one of the worst moments of my life took place as I watched my beloved 19 year old son plead nolo contendere to the felony of dealing marijuana. I listened as he addressed the judge clearly and politely; I listened as she explained the rights that were being taken away. It stung me as she told him that the most basic right of a citizen, the right to vote, would be refused him for five years.
He got the best sentence possible under the circumstances. He was being sent to drug rehab for six months to a year instead of being exposed to the harsh and dangerous environment in our state prison. It was the outcome we had all been praying for. But my son has already started detox and rehab two weeks ago. It’s been tough for him, and he has missed home terribly. He had hoped against hope that he would only be there for three months, at most six. When the sentencing finally came, he began to close up like a turtle resolutely drawing into his shell. My son wouldn’t talk to us and wouldn’t look at us. It brought my ex-husband to tears. I felt like crying, too, but I knew I had also won a years-long battle to get my boy the help he needed, painful though it was. My son was addicted to much more dangerous drugs than the marijuana. I had finally done the only thing I could do to get him help and hopefully make it end.
I finally had my cry at the end of the day while I thought of the beautiful baby I had 19 years ago and the young man who had to stand guilty before the court this morning. How it hurt to see him punished and to know he desperately needs the correction and discipline the rehab house will give him. I wondered if God “weeps”, or the spiritual equivalent, when we disobey and must receive harsh consequences. Do my actions hurt the heart of God the way my son’s actions hurt mine? It makes me think a lot differently about my own disobedience.
I was thinking tonight about a verse I must have learned decades ago because the way I recalled it was in the King James Version, which I haven’t used in a long time. This is the New King James Version of the verse:
My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. – James 1:2 -4
Patience has its perfect work to do. Patience (or perseverance in the NIV) was the quality I need to call upon in the months ahead. Even though my son doesn’t trust in Jesus, he is going to have to learn patience, too. He needs patience with the situation he’s in and the rehab where he must stay. He needs patience with himself to face the feelings that led him to use street drugs and prescription drugs to feel better. And many of us are hoping and praying that someday he will have patience because he recognizes that it is the Lord who is bringing healing to his life.
Tomorrow is a new day to pray for my son. Tomorrow is also a new day for me to count my trials “all joy” and be patient while God works patience in me.
Postscript: It is now the end of August and Jon is beginning to enjoy the feeling of being drug free. He is starting to gain perspective and it’s wonderful to see the “real” Jon unmasked by the drugs. It’s a real encouragement to see him start down the right road.
Anointing with the Oil of Joy
By · CommentsMy last blog was about my son Jon’s near death experience with heroin and other drugs. I’d been studying rejoicing, one of the fruits of the Spirit. Rejoice in all things, Paul said. Now that “all things” weren’t so hot, I challenged myself.
The first reason to rejoice: my son lived. He awoke at the hospital and was able to talk to us. Later, while he slept, I watched his breathing the way parents watch a newborn’s little breaths while he sleeps. It seemed no less a miracle to me now as it had then. Looking into his groggy blue eyes, I was so thankful I was even seeing them again.
I rejoiced in what Jon had to say when he awoke. I’m really sorry, he said. I know I need help. I want to get clean. I want to go to rehab. Of course his bravado returned in a couple of days, but in all these years of drug use he had never, ever acknowledged that he was at rock bottom and needed help. Unmasked in the seriousness of the situation, he admitted that he’d lost control of his drug use.
Another blessing in disguise: Jon had pneumonia and had to stay in the hospital for a few days. There he was able to see how many people cared about him as friends visited. He was not so alone in the world as he had imagined.
Something unusual happened when we found Jon in his bedroom at home. He had been saving a two-liter soda bottle filled with water. His friend, Jesse, had brought it over the last time he visited us and had forgotten it there. After Jesse died Jon kept the water bottle on the floor like a relic, and it was by his feet when we found him unconscious. I knew that was “holy water” as far as Jon was concerned, but one of his friends grabbed the bottle and threw the water on his face to try and revive him. When I told Jon what happened to the water, he said, “So he saved me. Jesse saved me.”
At the most I would entertain the idea that the hand of Jesus was guiding Jesse’s when he left that bottle there almost two years ago. But after that Jon didn’t ridicule God again. If I mentioned God, he never again told me that there was no God and my beliefs were on par with the Tooth Fairy. He saw in that forgotten water bottle a spiritual intervention to save his life, and he gave up his insistence that the world consisted only of what we can touch and see. It’s a start. I rejoice.
I wasn’t prepared to be tested and tempted to display my worst attitudes.
After nine hours of standing watch over my son, I left the hospital. Getting away will be a relief from the tension, right? Oh, no. The assault came immediately.
I sat down to eat at a restaurant with family members. All I wanted was a respite and a bowl of soup. They had an agenda. (Do not eat with people with agendas. It spoils the digestion.)
I tried three times to change the subject, but one family member was completely undeterred. She was going to ask every question about Jon’s situation then and there. She caught me when I was tired, scared, and hungry. It was not a good conversation.
As we left the restaurant, she berated me for not “making connections” and not “giving trust”. She said that as I’d called her early in the morning about Jon’s condition, she was entitled to details. I said nothing, but I left the parking lot furious. Couldn’t she see I’d had enough? Why didn’t she care about the condition I was in? What made her think I owed her anything? Couldn’t she let me eat in peace?
I knew I needed to forgive them, but the restless waves that often form our family relationships rose to a tsunami. This has really crossed the line, I fumed. There was no consideration for me. She didn’t want to know about Jon, she wanted information for her own gratification. They think if they’d been Jon’s mother they’d be doing a better job. They’d know the answers. They’d get him in rehab. They think I failed.
I was upset, too, that anger and unforgiveness were getting the better of me. I kept thinking of the lines of an old gospel song: “Joy, joy, joy/ Joy in the Holy Ghost/ Don’t let anybody rob your joy/ there’s joy in the Holy Ghost”. In the hospital I had tried so hard to rejoice in this disaster. Now this situation had robbed my precious joy and replaced it with a rock-hard heart, and I hadn’t stopped it. I’d even reveled in it. Weren’t their bad behaviors rooted in attitudes I had suspected all along? Didn’t they deserve my contempt?
My mind came back to Philippians 2:5 – 7:
Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
Did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
But made Himself nothing……
Equality with God is a big deal for Jesus to let slip from His grasp. It’s one of the many humbling things He did for us. I have what I think of as my own big deals. I mean, they’re big deals to me, but God’s not so impressed. What if that passage said:
Anne should not consider being respected as something to be grasped; or
Anne should not consider always being right as something to be grasped; or
Anne should not consider always having her way as something to be grasped.
I have a feeling there could be a hundred more of those uncomfortable little phrases informing me I have to let my grasp go.
In Psalm 45, the bridegroom is praised in this way:
You love righteousness and hate wickedness;
Therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
By anointing you with the oil of joy.
Psalm 45:7
I pray that I would hate the wickedness that would have my heart,
And I would lift my hands to praise God,
And He would anoint them with the oil of joy
So my grasp would slip from the things that would rob me.
Joy in the Trial
By · CommentsOne thing I’m noticing about rejoicing: we are told to rejoice in the most unlikely circumstances. The apostle Paul is full of joy while he’s under house arrest, while out on the streets of Rome, mixed in with true evangelists, men with false motives are also preaching the gospel. The book of James launches right in: “Count it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds…” (James 1:2) As I’m looking at Paul’s example and James’ lesson, I just knew the moment was coming for me to test this out.
Boy, did it ever.
Last Tuesday morning at 3 a.m. I found myself in my son Jon’s room. Two of his friends and I had found him unconscious in a chair. The air was thick with pot. Jon was covered in vomit, ashen, and not breathing. Not breathing.
“Call 911,” I ordered one of his friends while I picked up Jon’s lolling head and supported his neck. I pulled him upright and found it caused him to gasp for air past the vomit in his airway. I kept doing it. “Keep breathing, Jon,” I told him, but he wasn’t breathing except for those gasps I forced his lungs to take. As I looked at my hand behind his neck I had a flashback to supporting his newborn head in the first moments I had ever held him. Nineteen years later, was I doing this for the last time?
Of course, we didn’t arrive at this wretched scene from out of the blue. At the beginning, Jon was a longed for and cherished baby, the first boy in 41 years on my side of the family. We loved and nurtured him intellectually, spiritually and physically. But even as a baby Jon was stubborn. Every limit had to be tested, every barrier needed a battering ram.
Around the seventh grade the first strands began to unravel. There were sliding grades, problems at school, and the beginnings of drug abuse. Yes, there were serious problems in our home, but Jon was going out and heaping problem upon problem. We tried to get him help, but Jon was like a tornado headed out on his own path, churning up more trouble than we could keep up with.
Where did we go wrong? Did we go wrong? We certainly got plenty of advice. Advice, however, is cheap. Solutions were nonexistent.
There had been two other episodes with drugs and two other polices visits to our home. Each time we hoped it would be the clarion call that would wake up Jon. Then, when he was 17, one of his closest friends died in an accident. Jon became fatalistic and started taking unreasonable risks. Worst of all, he refused to believe in God.
Where was the little boy who loved Bibleman and Captain Bible, who sat on my lap for hours while I read Little Pilgrim’s Progress and The Chronicles of Narnia? We were forced to watch Jon’s faith sink into fatalism just as we helplessly saw the drug abuser’s mindset overtake him.
Tonight was by far the worst. As we waited for the police to come, one of his friends, a Christian boy he’d known all his life, prayed over him frantically. Once the policeman was standing by me, I remember saying, “Thank God”. Isn’t that what we always think? That the police and rescue will come, and they will fix it?
The police found the needle, and the tracks on his arm, and another dose of heroin in his room. Later we would find out that on this night, he’d used a concoction of Xanax, pot, vodka, and three shots of heroin. When he got to the ambulance, his respiration rate was 6. People on their deathbeds have rates of 6.
No one was offering any assurances that they caught him in time. They put him in the ambulance; the doors swung shut. The ambulance didn’t leave for a while. Not good. I looked at those closed doors and wondered if I would ever see Jon again. Jon’s 16 year old sister and I stood on the lawn and bawled, not caring who in the neighborhood would hear us in the middle of the night.
Count it all joy. Somehow.
More to follow about Jon later this week.
Looking for the Open Window
By · CommentsRecently a greeting card had me laughing in the middle of Wal-Mart. A man and his wife were in bed for the night when a bald old man with a long white beard and moustache came up to their bedroom window, smiling. The woman was shrieking in horror at the sight of the stalker? intruder? murderer?
The inside of the card declared, “When God closes a door, sometimes He opens a window.”
It's often said that when God closes a door, He opens a window.
For quite some time I’ve needed employment that would bring in the kind of income that would pay for my home and household expenses. I have a degree in music performance that was not going to help me now. In the business world of the 21st century, my skills as an office worker in the 1980’s were laughable. The jobs on line were all looking for my resume. What resume was that? I didn’t really have one. And I loathed and dreaded the prospect of returning to school. One run through the gauntlet of academia was enough, and then some, as far as I was concerned. So when I prayed, “Lord, you know I need a job,” it was not the same as when I was in my early twenties and needed work. I was praying for some specific conditions that would meet the needs and abilities I had now, which were very different.
This year I became distracted from my financial needs. My son has had a very difficult year so far and that took up my energy. When there was flooding in the spring, I was one of those with a lake in my basement, and many hours were devoted to repair before we could return home, and more repair afterwards. When there was finally a break in the action, I looked at my finances and realized the situation had become dire while my attention had been diverted. Now the prayers became really urgent and heartfelt. Something had to open up – now.
I want to tell you what happened before and after that prayer. God prepared me for that moment of prayer, and as I said above, it looks like the window is opening for me at last.
BEFORE:
Just a couple of weeks before the financial crisis, God brought me to a place where I could heal from the guilt of my divorce. I’ve written some things before about this wonderful moment when I finally realized that God was not punishing me. It came to a head because guilt was stopping me from believing God could have an answer for me, or blessings for me. Guilt gnawed at me when I knew that all I could do was go forward from here. Guilt even gnawed at me although I knew in Christ I was forgiven. Counselors would write evaluations of my son and mention that his troubles began when our marriage became difficult, and my heart would sink. Some circumstance would go wrong and I would think, maybe my plans fall through because of the divorce. The idea of a curse became a superstition with me.
God sent me back to the Bible to see that there was no verse that said for some sins God punishes continually even if I repent. Then I found a humorous coupon that author Steve Brown has on his website: A certificate entitling the bearer to three free sins. Laughing, I immediately knew what I wanted my first free sin to be. Then I began to see his point: because of the blood of Jesus, I don’t need a coupon to be free from the consequences of three sins. I have been freed from the consequences of all the sins I have been mourning.
“Then I acknowledged my sin to You and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord’ – and You forgave the guilt of my sin.” – Psalm 32:5
Moreover, I am not cursed, but blessed:
“Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.” – Psalm 32: 1 & 2
PRAYER:
When I prayed for the financial help I desperately needed, I called on God in the brokenness of my situation, not awash with the guilt of my past. I could not fix it. Only He could.
“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” – Psalm 51:17
This was a huge difference in my attitude in prayer. Because of what had been lifted from me in “BEFORE”, now I believed God had forgiven me and He would be willing to bless me again. Sometimes I got anxious, sometimes I cried, but I kept turning to the hope that God would bring the answer.
“My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him.” – Psalm 62:5, KJV
AFTER:
My great friend Michelle called me seven days later. She had heard from an old friend she hadn’t seen in years. The woman wanted to know if she knew people who needed a job, who were worried that they would lose their home. She wanted to hire some people and give them professional training in her trade.
This certainly seemed to fit a lot of my prayer requests. I was someone who needed a job and whose house was on the line. The offer came through a friend rather than the route of a want ad or resume, where I couldn’t compete. The education was going to be one on one, where skills can be “caught” rather than taught. This was the way I learned music and is my favorite method of learning. I could work hours that accommodated my daughter’s transportation needs for school. As I became skilled, I could earn a substantial portion of my budget this way.
You might be expecting me to say that I then wrestled to determine the Lord’s will. And you might be surprised to learn that I can’t say I did. I have done that in years past. Instead, this is the attitude I took: I prayed, something that held answers to my particular requests appeared, I will thank God for it, and I am going through the open door to see what God does here.
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” – Isaiah 30:21
Either 1) This is the way God has for me to ease the financial burden; or 2) I will see God teaching me something here, but in time leading me to something else.
Am I cut out for this new endeavor? We will have to wait and see!
When He is Doing Something New
By · CommentsK-LOVE, the Christian rock radio station, sends me a Bible verse of the day. Last week many were about God doing new things. A couple of examples:
Tuesday was
“For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?” – Isaiah 43:19
And Thursday brought
“For I am doing something in your own day, something you wouldn’t believe even if someone told you about it.” – Habakkuk 1:5
I thought this was pretty interesting, because in my week every day brought new things. Really new.
"We pray, and we wait, for God to move. Then God acts all at once. The landscape, and the very earth beneath us, changes."
We pray, and we wait, for God to move. Then God acts all at once. The landscape, and the very earth beneath us, changes. Monday was one of the most difficult days I’ve had in a long time. God really did do something new at my house on Tuesday; before the sun was up, the feline population here had increased from two to eight. Everyone’s life changed dramatically, and not pleasantly, on Thursday. My head was much clearer Friday, but my clarity of thought gave me some jarring insights. One day was despair and the next brought relief. It was exhausting.
I tend to think that new is good. I suspect that’s a cultural attitude we hear all the time in advertising. You know, “new and improved.” Every day held something drastically new, but some of the “new” was bittersweet. Some of the “new” changed the whole playing field. I felt like one of the bad guys in Popeye, being swung over Popeye’s head and slamming onto the floor on either side. Was it good? Was it bad? It sure was happening fast. God was moving, and my kids and I (and a lot of cats) were along for the ride. And the ride’s not over yet.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him…. Romans 8:28a
But sometimes as “the good” is being worked out, it doesn’t seem like it’s good.
When I looked at the passage above from Isaiah, God was promising obviously good things to Israel: water is coming to the desert and wasteland, times of refreshing. Conversely, the prophet Habakkuk is asking God for justice against wrongdoers, and the new thing God promises him is undoubtedly working for the good, but it’s terrifying: The Babylonians are coming to conquer as a judgment. “They fly like a vulture swooping to devour; they all come bent on violence,” God tells him in Habakkuk 1:9a.
All I knew was to hold on tight to God, to trust that He had everything well in hand and He would see us through. Things might not work out as I would like them to be, but God has a plan, and He would direct.
While I feel the discomfort of all the change, what stays steady is our God. Change startles and confuses us, but the Lord is not surprised. We often say, “He’s always there.” When you yourself are in the storm you can feel like asking where “there” is. David says,
If I go up to the heavens, You are there;
If I make my bed in the depths, You are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
If I settle on the far side of the sea,
Even there your hand will guide me,
Your right hand will hold me fast. – Psalm 139:8 – 10
“There” is right where you stand now.
“There” is above you and all about you, protecting you in the storm.
“There” is beside you, waiting for you to turn to Him and let Him take care of the changes that are so frightening.
We get surprised or ambushed. We tremble or weep at the things drastically changing around us. But Hebrews says
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. – Hebrews 13:8
Just as we need Him every day, He is present every day, the Rock that hides us in the storm, the Rock on which we stand when change comes.
Thinking About: Do Christians HAVE To “Go To Church”?
By · CommentsI’m still thinking about people like Anne Rice who say they’re leaving Christianity, but who state unequivocally that they love Jesus. They’re very disillusioned by organized religion, and I certainly understand that. I see a lot of people in the discussion, though, who are confusing Christianity with belonging to a denomination or a local church, and that’s not at all what Christianity is. Christianity is simply the name ascribed to those who believe in and follow Jesus (Acts 11:25-26).
And Jesus didn’t belong to a local church or a denomination. He was Jewish by birth, the Son of God, and He actually did a lot of rebuking of religious people who clung to traditions that missed the heart of God: Love. Mercy. Justice.
So it should follow that “Going to church” doesn’t make me a Christian, and being a Christian doesn’t require my “going to church” in order to obey God. Or does it?
Do I have to go to church if I'm a Christian?
Jesus gathered with His disciples often, to teach and encourage them. His disciples went on to do the same with other disciples, as Jesus commanded them to “go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.” (Matthew 28:19-20)
The early Christians gathered together every single day in the temple courts (the Jewish temple), and broke bread (ate together) in one another’s homes (Acts 2:42-47).
The writer of Hebrews admonished Christians to not turn our backs on the importance of gathering together to “stimulate one another to love and good deeds,” and to “encourage one another” (Hebrews 10:23-25).
But here’s where many Christians get confused by tradition: we don’t have to gather together in big, fancy buildings on Sunday mornings. We can gather together over a shared meal, at the park, in our living rooms, serving alongside one another in ministry, or wherever else Christians come together, with the intent of encouraging one another in our faith, and inspiring one another to do good deeds in love.
I know that probably upsets some people, particularly those who make a living by serving on staff at churches, or who run the finances and pay the bills with their members’ weekly offerings, but it’s the truth. The first Christians didn’t build big fancy buildings that had to be financially supported. (Romans 16:5, 1 Corinthians 16:19, Colossians 4:15, Philemon 1:2)
Paul asked the individuals in the churches (local communities of believers) he’d planted to set aside an offering on the first day of each week, save it up, and wait for him to come. The offering would be delivered to the poor “saints” (Christians) in Jerusalem (Romans 15:25-26, 1 Corinthians 16:1-4). The model there is for Christians to think of their brothers and sisters outside their local communities of believers, and to care for one another wherever we are. That’s why we support missionaries. I’ve never believed that was a “read between the lines” command for Christians to gather together every Sunday in a special building to recite a liturgy, sing some songs, listen to a sermon, and take an offering.
But what I do know is that believers, whom Jesus called “the church” (Matthew 16:18), cared for one another. They were communities of believers within the larger communities they lived in. They shared everything, ate together, and ministered to one another (Acts 2:42-47). In our culture today, we follow that pattern by finding local groups of believers, usually (but not necessarily) in the form of a group who meet together in a church building built especially for the purpose of worshiping together regularly.
However, I know many Christians have been hurt and disillusioned by local churches who are led by false teachers (2 Peter 2:1-22, 1 Timothy 1:3-20), churches whose members have an “us against them” mentality that’s decidedly not Christ-like, and churches who spend exorbitant amounts of money on staff, programs, and buildings while the poor in their neighborhoods (and in their own churches!) suffer. I understand the disillusionment of many of my brothers and sisters. I do.
That’s why Jesus and Paul warned us that there would be false teachers and false converts, people who would do things in the name of Jesus, but about whom He would say, “‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!” (Matthew 7:15-23)
That’s also why I know I’m so thankful to have found a healthy local church in my own journey of faith.
In my next 5 posts, I’ll share 5 reasons I love my own local church. I think when you’re done reading the posts, you’ll agree that I’m blessed!
In the meantime, why do you love “going to church” — or not?
Accepted in the Beloved
By · Comments(Any terms I use in this blog are for explanatory purposes only. If any have fallen into disuse or are now “politically incorrect”, I apologize and assure you I intend nothing derogatory.)
A few weeks ago my daughter and I stumbled upon the movie “Freaks”, new to us, but evidently something of a cult classic. Made in 1932, the actors were people with anomalies who made up the circus sideshows of the time. By using the real circus performers, the movie caused an uproar. It was removed from the market, and Britain banned it outright. Ironically these actors were not being used as “freaks” but were being themselves with a dignity and normalcy the viewing public of the time probably never dreamed they had.
I’m telling you all this because I just can’t get the story out of my mind. Generally movies explain to you who the characters are. This one keeps asking me who I am.
Where I picked up the story, Hans, a young man who is a midget, is infatuated with Cleopatra, one of the normal size circus performers. She is amused and plays along as if Hans were a toy with no real feelings. When she accidentally finds out that Hans is heir to a great fortune, her game begins in earnest. She agrees to marry her unwitting suitor.
At the marriage feast, it is primarily the sideshow folk who come and sit together at one great, long table. The bride behaves abominably, getting very drunk, putting a drug in Hans’ drink (the first step toward killing him and taking his fortune) and kissing her real love interest in front of everyone, humiliating Hans. Apparently not everyone sees, because a dwarf begins a special ceremony at the far end of the table. (This you may already know because it is the most famous scene of the movie.) He gets on the table with an immense goblet of wine and walks to each guest, giving him or her a sip in turn. In your mind’s eye I want you to see these people. There are the bearded lady and the skeleton man; a woman with no arms and a man with no legs, and a man with neither arms nor legs; other little people; conjoined twins; persons they called pinheads who had tiny skulls that caused both physical deformity and mental retardation. As the cup is offered, the dwarf takes up a strange chant: “Gobble, gobble, we accept you, you are one of us.” Obviously, as Hans’ wife, Cleopatra is being accorded the honor of being embraced by the people of the sideshow, people so few understand. But when the goblet arrives, she pushes it away, screaming that she wants no part of them. “You’re all freaks!” she cries, betraying her true feelings.
The scene won’t leave my mind, but I am now in Cleopatra’s seat. I watch these unusual wedding guests, looking with some discomfort at their missing limbs and other unusual deformities. I think of how some of them cannot care for all their own basic needs and will always need caregivers. And then the cup comes to me. Will I take the cup? Will I identify with these people as ones like me?
I thought I wasn’t prejudiced. Or at least I wasn’t that prejudiced. I’m not prejudiced against blacks, and that’s the big one in the United States, so I’m okay, right? I have a dislike of some people groups, but if I met someone from one of those, I prided myself on putting that aside and concentrating on loving the person in front of me. But if I’m priding myself for coming halfway (or less), what am I really doing? Suddenly I wasn’t feeling so proud anymore.
What happened to the Scriptures I claimed I believed? Jesus prayed,
I have given [believers] the glory that You gave Me, that they may be one as We are one: I in them and You in Me. – John 17:22 & 23a
And Paul tells us:
To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law…so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law…so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. 1 Cor. 24 – 27
But the truth is, when I think of being one with certain people, because of their culture or behavior, I recoil.
Author Steve Brown often writes of his conversations with the Lord. I sense something akin to that as I think of my reaction to the “freaks”:
“So it’s okay for you to look at them just to see what they look like but not accept them?”
Shame on me.
“I came down from heaven to live with humanity. What do you think that was like?”
I imagined myself looking down from a bright and perfect heaven onto the masses of humanity on earth: The smells. The crowds. The soiled clothing. The cacophony. And, as each night falls, the darkness.
More than that, there was the condition of our hearts, every last heart leaving something to be desired. You might say we all had something missing or misshapen there.
“I once shared bread and a cup of wine around a table and accepted every one of you – in your sin.”
Nothing is so humbling as Jesus telling you He already did this very thing for you, and you have been unwilling to do the same. As a believer I share in the new covenant that was made at the Last Supper. In my mind’s eye I see that goblet, Christ’s goblet, making its way around the table that Passover night, a symbol of Jesus saying, “I accept you” when we were filthy in our sin. I would gladly drink that goblet when Jesus is holding it. But I’m only holding it out to select others – not all others – even though He came for every one of them, and I know it.
Seems I have some things to work out with God. And if I ever catch “Freaks” again on TV, you can be sure that’s one movie I will never see the same way again.
Self Abandoned to God
By · CommentsI was looking at an Oswald Chambers lecture recently entitled, Arriving at Myself. You may know Chambers from his enduring work, “My Utmost for His Highest”, a daily devotional book. Chambers’ wife wrote down many of his sermons and classroom lectures to seminary students, leaving us a rich trove of his knowledge and wisdom. This lecture hit me because, like so much of his writings, it seemed so relevant; it was delivered in 1915 , but it could have been written yesterday.
Oswald Chambers
Chambers is one of my favorite writers because his every thought brings you back to Christ. He pinpoints even subtle attitudes of secular thinking, and confronts them with truth. There you are, confronted with the words of Christ, the Godly perspective, the attitude that the Christian should have. In one hundred years the spiritual battleground has not changed so much as we think. It is just uncanny how these ideas are still around, pervading and warping our thinking.
Arriving at Myself is divided into six segments, but two of them especially made me stop and think. The first is entitled, “My Right to My Individual Self.” He explains individuality as the “husk of personality” that protects our personal life.
“But if individuality does not become transfigured by the grace of God, it becomes objectionable, egotistical and conceited, interested only in its own independence.”
We want our own ideas and our own ways from before our Christian experience to stay just where they are – but Jesus is telling us:
“If any man would come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” – Matthew 16:24
Chambers wastes no words in showing up our excuses:
“We cling to our individuality like a drowning man to a straw – ‘Of course God will recognize my individual peculiarisms and prejudices.’ “
Then Chambers compares it to God’s call:
“If we are to be disciples of Jesus Christ, our independent right to our individual self must go, and go altogether.”
It must go, and go altogether. For an example, look at some of the things in Ephesians 5 we are told to change that many of us don’t change because “we just are that way”:
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person – such a man is an idolater – has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. – Ephesians 5:3 – 5 (Italics mine)
Ouch. Ouch. I fail at both getting all these things out of my life and at replacing them with thanksgiving. I don’t make enough effort to always reflect that I belong to Him.
In college, I roomed at one time with a girl who had advertised for a Christian roommate. I came in one evening to find she was sitting at the kitchen table with a friend, both telling the filthiest sex jokes they could come up with. I took her aside in the hallway and called her on it, but she told me, “I’m a Scorpio, I can’t help it.” (Scorpio is the astrological sign associated with sexuality.) In other words, she was saying, “I want God, but He can’t have my fun, and I don’t care if you’re offended by it, either. I’ve found my excuse, and I’m keeping my individual independence.”
The next section cuts to the deepest point: “The Recognition of My Personal Self.” Its theme is Matthew 10:39 –
He that findeth his life shall lose it; and he that loseth his life for My sake shall find it.
Chambers’ first sentence clearly shows what he wants us to recognize about the personal self:
We have to recognize that our personal life is meant for Jesus Christ.
But will we give it to Jesus or keep holding on to and examining the experiences, thoughts and emotions that He already knows?
It amazed me that Chambers mentions how this is the opposite of the “modern jargon” of self realization. Evidently people have been trying to look within and draw their feelings out to find the “answers” well before Transcendental Meditation and the various New Age regimens. By giving your personal self to Christ, the Holy Spirit will help you remember what you need to know and better yet, lead you toward Jesus, His love, His cleansing and real answers.
Some methods pull up too many emotions or traumas for a person to handle at one time. It can be frightening and injurious. The Holy Spirit shows you only what you can handle of the things that have been buried deep inside, in the order that you can handle it. Having experienced God’s loving, gentle healing I would never want another method. In the past I have seen a therapist – they can be immensely helpful – but I prayed that God would guide those sessions so they would not become overwhelming.
Chambers warns against using Christian service as a cover. Jesus is not just looking for our giving in service, but in giving our very selves. Chambers writes,
“The great dominating recognition is that my personal self belongs to Jesus….The point is, will I surrender my individual life entirely to Him?”
Chambers goes on to explain that this is laying at His feet not just our sins, but good things. Are our hopes and dreams subject to Him or do we keep them as our own? Are our loved ones in His hands or do we clutch them in ours? Several people in my life have died at an early age, and I have had to learn in my sorrow that they were not mine to keep.
I hope the last paragraph grips you as it did me as Chambers ends by gathering up all our difficulties in life and says that at their root, they are one and the same:
“Jesus Christ asks us to give up the best we have got to Him, our right to ourselves. There is only this one crisis, and in the majority of lives it has never been reached, we are brought up to it again and again, and every time we go back. Self-realisation must be renounced in order that Jesus Christ may realize Himself in us.”
God’s Economy
By · CommentsFirst, I’m sorry blogs were so sparse last week. My computer crashed and I was without it for a whole week. My trusty computer fixer, Ben Burnett, told me there was so much that had wormed its way into our files that it took every trick in the book to restore it. Due to his work, we are back to normal (thank you, Ben), and I am picking up where I left off.
I had looked at the account of the rich young ruler in Matthew 19 to see what God is looking for in our hearts when we think about possessions. Jesus also assures his disciples that those who have left behind possessions or loved ones for His sake
“will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.” – Matthew 19:29b
But He also cryptically tells them,
But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first. – Matthew 19:30
Then I noticed that Jesus continued on, saying,
For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire men to work in his vineyard. – Matthew 20:1
So begins the parable of the workers. The incident, and the teaching, evidently sparked the parable to shed light on what had just happened. The young ruler couldn’t bring himself to let go of his wealth and possessions to give to the less fortunate, and he leaves. Jesus explains how greatly those who give up earthly things will have them restored. Now Jesus is giving those who remain a lesson in how God runs His economy.
The master of the story is in fact a rich man, a vineyard owner. He goes into town at dawn, and in a manner that is still in use today, he gathers up unemployed men to work for the day for a coin, a denarius. Today a denarius is worth about $20 in the USA, and it was commonly the day’s wages for unskilled labor. At about nine in the morning, what the people in Jesus’ time called the “third hour,” the landowner returns to town and finds more men to work for him. He promises to pay them “whatever is right.” Again at noon, at three, and even at “the eleventh hour,” or about an hour before sunset, he brings more idle men to work his vineyard.
At sunset, the work day ends. The men who came last and only worked one hour are given a denarius. The men who have been harvesting all day take this as a sign that they will receive more, but they are paid only the promised denarius. They complain that they did the brunt of the work, but the master says to one man,
“Friend, I am not being unfair to you. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the man who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous? Matthew 20:13b – 15
This isn’t a satisfying answer in our way of looking at things. Shouldn’t it be “a day’s work for a day’s pay?” If it looks lopsided to us, don’t we deserve to know why? Well – no. Notice that many grumbled, but the explanation was only given to one man. Beyond knowing that the master chose to be generous, we don’t know why things worked out the way they did.
How different from the health/wealth doctrine that says if we have enough faith, we can definitely have certain rewards here on earth. God is not bound by what we expect to be rewarded with.
But sometimes we feel that God “owes” us something. Our faithfulness, we think, should have guaranteed protection against the hard times we face. We think, won’t you take a barter, God, for the healing of a loved one? We invent terms we hope we can get God to accept, thinking that we can fulfill them. These are not God’s terms. He doesn’t have to accept them. We were not saved by anything we have done, and we cannot trade our works for an arrangement with Him.
We do know, however, that He watches over and takes care of those who love and follow Him. Psalm 34:19 says:
A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all…
It’s the righteous person, cleansed with Jesus’ blood, that God promises to deliver, not the one who has made a deal with God promising to do this or that.
Another example of God’s division of wealth comes from the Old Testament: 1Samuel 30. David is not yet king, but he does have a camp of men who support him and follow him. The Amalekites raid their camp when the men are not there and kidnap their wives and children. David and the men “wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep” 1 Samuel 30:4 They are outraged and pursue the Amalekites. Between their grief and their strenuous pursuit, 200 of the 600 men are completely exhausted and cannot go on. They stay with the camp supplies at the Besor Ravine as those who can keep going catch up to the raiders, kill most of them, regain their families and take plunder.
When they return to camp, some of the 400 men expect to keep the plunder for themselves. But David tells them:
“No, my brothers, you must not do that with what the Lord has given us. He has protected us and handed over to us the forces that came against us. Who will listen to what you say? The share of the man who stayed with the supplies is to be the same as that of him who went down to the battle. All will share alike.” – 1Samuel 30:24
I believe David is saying that all these men were following David for the same purpose, and God had blessed them all through the victory, so the blessing of the plunder belonged to all of them. I’ve wondered, too, if this was because the men who stayed behind had done all they could do, and they were not going to be penalized for that. It’s another moment when God’s economy is not our economy.
The tax collector Zacchaeus, who climbed a tree in Luke 19:1-10 to get a glimpse of Jesus over the heads of the crowd that followed Him, offered half of his possessions to the poor and to repay those he had cheated four times the amount involved. Nothing was said about that portion being unacceptable. On the contrary, Jesus says,
“Today salvation has come to this house, because this man, too, is a son of Abraham.” – Luke 19:9
Why was the rich young ruler told that for his heart to be right before God, he had to give it all? Zacchaeus’ heart attitude was evidently in a very different place, and Jesus treats him accordingly.
This is the reason, I believe, why the parable of the workers is tied to the conversation with the young ruler. Jesus is showing us that
“My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Neither are your ways, My ways,” declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways
And My thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8 & 9
We can look for and expect His blessings, but we cannot define them or control them. What we do know is that the Lord is generous, and when we see God’s generosity blessing us or someone we love, we can rejoice in it.
